Look What We Caught

James set a small animal trap under our back deck a few days ago. Our intentions were to catch a couple of the neighborhood cats. I normally don't have problems with cats-- I actually like them, but these particular cats have to go. They are on some kind of turf war over my yard. They keep pooping everywhere to claim territory. 

Both of the frenchies are shit seeking missiles and eat said cat poop. Of course, the cat poop is never solid cat poop. It's cat explosive diarrhea. I'm constantly wiping cat shit off the dogs' faces. I love those dogs, but if I could not do that chore, that would be super. Hence, we set the traps to catch the cats. For relocation. I don't want to hurt them, I just want them to poop somewhere else. 

Anyway, backstory aside,  I peeked under the deck today while I was winding up the hose and I was surprised to see a little face looking back at me. For days the trap had been empty. But we caught something today. And that something was pissed. We caught a medium sized opossum.  

The opossum hissed at us the entire time we had it. It was a silent hiss, but I could see the hate in its eyes and I knew he was hissing. That's how pissed off this opossum was that he had been caught-- he couldn't even articulate it. He was probably minding is own business last night when he caught the whiff of days old salmon in the cage and thought to himself, "Wow, that smells delicious! I should enter this wire funnel to eat it." And BAM he was trapped. 

James took him over to a neighboring corn field and dropped him off. I didn't want to kill the little pissed off guy. It's not his fault he's really stupid and got caught. The trap is going back under the deck tonight with more cat enticing food inside it. I hope I don't catch more unwanted critters. 

On Assignment

After months and months of going back and forth with my branch manager and my retention NCO, I am very happy to report that I am finally on assignment. I actually got something that I wanted and wasn't stuck taking the lesser of evils.

I'm on assignment to go to Fort Wainwright, Alaska. My branch manager was able to slot me in MEDDAC. I've never worked MEDDAC before. The idea of doing something so outside of the realm of anything I've done before is a bit daunting. Some people love working in the hospital, and others really hate it. But I am excited. I'm excited to go somewhere I've never been and work a job I've never done.

My report date isn't until late 2016. December, actually. I'll try to request early report so I don't have to drive through Canada in the winter. I'm so excited! I will have to get snow boots for the Frenchies!

Alaska bound!

Graduation Is Set

I just applied for graduation. Graduation of what, you ask? Well, I decided to get me one of them college degrees. It's just an associates in Health Sciences. It's not fancy, and quite frankly, I got A LOT of credits given to me by my Army experiences. Since I've been in the Army nearly 10 years, I would hope some of that would be granted as credit. Nothing better than on the job training!

Any one who has asked me knows I never had plans of getting a degree of any kind. I'm not a book learnin' kind of gal. But now that I know I do not qualify for any special assignments in the Army, I need a degree to keep me competitive for promotion to Sergeant First Class.

Graduation is in February. Come March I will be back in school working towards that Bachelors in Public Health. Oh boy. I guess you can teach an old dog new tricks.

Long Hair

My hair is really super long. I mean, kinda ridiculously long. If I wore an unfashionable long jean skirt people would totally think I was a radical Christian woman. Good thing I'd never wear a jean skirt. All my tattoos wouldn't really support the radical Christian image either... what I'm saying is, my hair is long. My hair is long and I give bad analogies. 

I've cut it back a few times. Most recently, in November 2013, I cut nearly 10 inches off. I thought it would be helpful to have shorter hair when I deployed to Egypt. I hated it. I regretted it. I don't think it made anything easier, either. My remorse game was strong.

Almost 2 years later, I am starting to feel the itch to cut my hair shorter again. 

Why? 

Why do I want to do something again that I know I hated before? Well, I'm convinced it was the style that I hated and not the lack of length. I think if I didn't go layer crazy like I did 2 years ago, I would like it more. I don't want to cut it so short that I can't put it in a bun. The ability to have a work bun is important. 

I need a change. Someone talk me out of it if you think it will make me as unhappy has the 2013 hair chopping. 

DA Photo

So when you get promoted to Staff Sergeant, your orders tell you that you have to have a DA photo taken within 30 days. I was in Egypt when I got promoted, so I got a pass on the 30 days. But I should have taken the picture as soon as I got back. Well now it's been 17 months since I got promoted and I FINALLY got around to having the picture taken. 

A DA photo is a Department of the Army official photo. The DA Photo is used to quickly determine a Soldier’s professionalism and military bearing while conducting a promotion board or in a situation where the Solider is not physically present. This picture is supposed to represent how awesome I am without me being there to wow a crowd with my stunning personality. 

And to see if the Soldier is fat. I think that might be the reason the DA photo is most used. 

I had one of my best Army girlfriends help me put together my uniform the night before. If you've ever put all the badges and ribbons onto a female's uniform, you know how time consuming it can be. It's always best to have someone helping you. I think she did a fabulous job making sure my ribbons are placed exactly where they need to be. 

The photo process was quick and easy. And I think it turned out phenomenal. I don't know why I waited as long as I did. Actually, I do know why I waited. I wanted those Air Assault wings in my picture!

Picasso's Birthday!

Today was Picasso's birthday!

He's a grown up 5 years old now! It's hard to believe he's gotten so old! It seems like I just picked him up from Drain, Oregon when he cried the whole ride home. That drive sort of made me reconsider getting a puppy. I'm glad I didn't run away screaming, because he turned out to be my special little guy. Even if he does have a lot of social issues. 

Picasso had wet dog food for his birthday dinner. It was some awful chicken dish that also eerily reminded me of an MRE. (What the hell does the Army feed us!?) We took a long walk, where he peed on everything, as he usually does. There are a couple marigold plants in the neighborhood that I have no doubt belong to him.

Happy birthday, Picasso Destroyer of Worlds! My special, most favorite little boy!

Gertie's Birthday!

Happy birthday, Gertie! My little girl turned 1 year old today!

 

 

All day long I have been telling her she is a big girl now. Its time to cut out all the puppy crap. She has yet to take my advise/warning to heart since she ate cat diarrhea and vomited it in the house twice today. That is not big girl behavior.

 

Her birthday was uneventful. Which is fine, because she is a dog. It rained most of the day so we didn't get to go for a walk. But she did get wet dog food for dinner (yummy) and it smelled like a beef MRE (not so yummy). I also gave her a bright pink dog crate! I assume it's still politically correct to give gender associated toys and accessories to animals, right?

 

Happy birthday Gertrude The Impaler! Mommy loves you!

Batman

I have a new pet. Well, he's not really a pet, I guess. But he's a critter and he lives in my yard so I am taking ownership.

 

I have a bat! A little brown bat. He's taken up residency in the sycamore tree in the backyard. I noticed him for the first time yesterday. I was standing around under the tree waiting for Picasso to do his business. I looked up into the tree and there was a brown blob hanging from one of the branches. It looked like a kiwi. The fruit. I'm pretty confident sycamore trees don't produce kiwis, so the next logical explanation was that it was a little bat.

 

 

He wasn't doing anything but hanging upside down. It was dusk, so I was encouraging him to go fly around and eat bugs. He just kept sleeping. So I have a lazy bat. That's fitting. James poked him with a stick and he irrupted into frenzied flight. That didn't scare him off, though, because he's back in the sycamore tree again today. Hanging upside down, being lazy.

 

I'm going to call him Batman. I hope he sticks around because he's really cute.

Kitchen Back Splash

I am no professional. The combination of YouTube videos and my past experience remodeling a doll house, I managed to put up a new backsplash in the kitchen. By no means does it look like I paid someone to do it. But it looks a whole hell of a lot better than the crap I had on the wall before! 



 

 



 

The particle board fake blue tiles that were on the wall were so gross. I can't believe I lived with them as long as I did. It was extremely satisfying ripping it off the walls. It came off very easily, too, like it knew it was hideous and deserved to go into the garbage.

 

The grout job I did is a little sketchy because I let it harden too much before wiping the wall down. Now I know, lesson learned. Also, the tiles are a bit wonky around the switch plates. So I just won't look too closely at that. All and all, I am impressed with my $250 upgrade. My kitchen is a much prettier place.

 

And I feel like the awful blue countertops are a bit less hideous now.

2 Years

 

James and I had our 2 year wedding anniversary today. Although we haven't spent much of those 2 years physically together, or much of the 4 years we have been together total for that matter, it's been a good time. I love you, James.