1 Year Since...

It has been exactly 1 year since James gave me this beautiful diamond ring and asked me to be his wife.

We set a date before he went to Afghanistan, but since he's been gone, I have been feeling like he's going to be gone for SO LONG and the wedding is SO FAR AWAY... why make solid plans and arrangements?

 

Turns out, he's going to be home in 3 months, and then the wedding happens 3 months after that. 6 months from now, we are going to be in Las Vegas making it legal in front of our friends and family, and all I have is a dress and the venue.

 

Holy crap, I lack the bride gene, I guess, because I should have been in full swing planning mode a while ago!!

Luckily, Planet Hollywood is going to do 80% of all the wedding planning. Getting married in Las Vegas is probably the best way a lazy person can get married and have it be a success! AND it's not nearly as expensive as a traditional wedding, and it will still be classy! I picked a great venue!

But I need to get hot on picking out invitations to send out! August 10, 2013 is coming up faster than I can think!

Valentine's Day Flowers

I worked late on Valentine's Day. Surprise, surprise.

 

When I finally got home, I had a little note on the door from a florist saying they had tried to deliver me flowers but I wasn't home. Lately, I have been running into situations where it is assumed I don't have a job and will be home all day. This is one of the most annoying things about living in a military town-- I am always assumed to be a housewife instead of a Soldier. Irritating.

 

I. Have. A. Job.

 

Anyway, I called the number on the card and this guy answers and says he already brought the flowers back to the florist. He's not delivering anymore. He told me I can go get them myself. I asked him when the florist closes. He says 5pm. It was nearly 6pm when I called him. Who was this idiot I was on the phone with?

 

So the NEXT day, February 15th, I punched the address to the florist into my GPS and HOLY CRAP. This florist had to be the furthest away from my house while still being within the Clarksville city limits as possible. It was a 28 minute drive. Luckily, the flowers were there when I got there, and hadn't been taken back out to be delivered (and not left at the door because I wasn't home).

 

 

The flowers are beautiful and they smell absolutely wonderful. Next year James can give me flowers in person on Valentine's Day. No matter what stupid hours I work.

Mandatory Fun

 

Haha! All the Army peeps out there get this one!

Don't you just love being forced to have fun, fake esprit de corps and watch the clock until you're allowed to disperse? Oh Army, you're so unique. Only you can ruin fun.

Army Combatives

This is sexy Combatives hair-- after being punched repeatedly. :)

 

I volunteered to go to Army Combatives Level 1 this week. It teaches hand to hand combat. Now, if you know anything about me, this is shocking that I volunteered for this class.

 

If there were 2 things I could take out of the Army FOR GOOD, they would be 3 to 5 second rushes and combatives. I loathe those two things.

 

So why would you volunteer to go, you ask? Promotion points. Combatives level 1 is worth 4 points. I thought it would be nice to have 4 more points, so what the heck, I'll go.

 

I'm not going to lie. I've done some things in the Army that have taken every ounce of my strength,  my energy and my will to finish. I have "found my heart" on more than one occasion to push through something so physically awful that tears were close behind. This combatives class is the most physically straining and challenging thing I have ever done in the Army to date. Laugh if you want to, all you giant buff dudes who thought Combatives level 1 was a joke. I am no athlete. I never have claimed such a thing! So this was a big deal for me.

 

My body has been so sore from rolling, getting slapped, punched, being tossed around and doing drills that are otherwise out of the ordinary for me, that I have had to actually yell out while doing basic human movements to get through the pain. Just sitting on the toilet causes my legs so much pain that I don't even want to go. Every time I'd move in my sleep, I'd wake up; my body was in so much pain!

 

The whole time I was being physically torchered in this class, I was convinced this was not worth 4 promotion points and that I was a fool to believe this would be a quick way to earn 4 points. I am not a quitter, and I wanted to quit! 4 points just wasn't worth the physical pain I was going through!

 

I am a very passive person and have never been in a physical fight. Well, this week I found out what it feels like to be slapped across the face as hard as my opponent could. I learned what it's like to be choked out until I passed out. And I learned what it was like to take an uppercut and to be pounded repeatedly in my legs, body and head by gloved fists worn by a 310lb man.

 

ONE of my bruise clusters on my thigh.

 

I am so GLAD this week is over. I graduated successfully. And I got my measly 4 points. But mostly, I'm proud of myself for working through something so physically challenging and not quitting or being so weak that I had to quit. So really, the 4 points are a bonus to the confidence boost I received this week.

 

And I still hate Combatives.

Brr! M16 Range

Today's weather forecast.

Today was day 2 of the M16 range hosted by my company. I totally lucked out yesterday and got to sit in the tower and be the firing line announcer. The tower is heated and cozy. I was busy, but not freezing my ass off like all of the firers.

 

I was a firer freezing my ass off today.

 

Let's start out by pointing out Fort Campbell had a 2 hour late start because of the snow and ice we had gotten last night. Somehow this barely effected the time line for the range and the 2 hour late start did not apply to us. The sand at the zero range was frozen. I had to jump in place in between firing iterations to keep my blood flowing, and still my feet were blocks of ice in my boots. And OF COURSE, wear of the fleece cap was unauthorized. Why would something designed to keep your head and ears warm be allowed to be worn? Craziness, I say!

Kick ass, poncho! Thanks for keeping me dry!

I laid my poncho down on the sand so I wouldn't have to lay in the icy sand. People made fun of me when I took it out the range with me. But they looked at that poncho longingly when they were laying in cold wet sand. Suckers!

 

I qualified like garbage the first time I fired (only 27 out of 40!? I blame the cold weather). But then I got my act together and shot expert like I normally do (36 out of 40-- that's more like it!).

 

This was such a cold range, probably the coldest one we'll have all year. I sure am glad I got to make it a wonderful memory of my time spent on Fort Campbell. And I hope I never get stationed someplace that is actually much colder than this and have to do many more Army tasks in the freezing cold. I'm a cold weather wuss!

Angry Dog Mom

I was so angry this morning that I screamed at Picasso. It was in the heat of the moment. And I'm not proud. But he made me so ANGRY.

 

I'm trying to phase out his favorite crochet toys (stupid Martha Stewart doesn't make them anymore). So I bought him a few cheap plastic squeaky toys. He removes the squeaker with freakish precision and leaves the rest of the toy unharmed. So I thought to myself, "Hey Self, if you can buy this dog $0.94 toys and he loves them, you should get many." So I did.

 

Notice the cheap plastic fire hydrant he is guarding with his life.

 

Of course there is a catch to this seemingly wonderfully cheap replacement for the crochet toys (why did you stop making them, Martha Stewart? I paid $10.00 per toy without batting an eye!). When Picasso plays with them, since they are mostly solid in shape, they get away from his paws somehow. They erratically roll around and he crazily follows them. Somehow they ALWAYS end up under the bookshelf in the living room or the dresser in the bedroom. ALWAYS.

 

He cannot reach them when they end up under there. It's not his fault he can't reach them. His arms are short. And he doesn't have thumbs for grabbing. But it is his fault that he insists on playing with his new toys beside these two pieces of furniture.

 

When they get lodged under there, out of his reach, he does the only thing he can: claw frantically at the wood and whine like no one can hear him. It's the most annoying behavior he's ever exhibited: and he was a terrible puppy.

 

So this morning when he woke me up to go potty, he got so excited at the sight of me getting out of bed that he grabbed one of his toys and immediately got it stuck under the dresser. I walked to the kitchen to get his leash, waited by the front door to take him out... and no Picasso. He was carrying on hysterically in the bedroom over the lost toy.

 

I called for him. Then I yelled for him. Then I got totally fed up and stalked towards the bedroom and screamed at him. He ran under the bed and assumed the "we're playing" pose: front legs out, butt in the air. Alright, I had been awake less than 3 minutes. I wasn't in the mood. I screamed at him some adult words that he is not old enough to hear, threw the leash on the floor and got back in bed. "Screw that guy, he doesn't really need to go out that badly if his toy is more important," I said to myself. 

 

He was silent under the bed for a half an hour. Then I was reawoken to the sound of him vomiting under the bed. Why? Why does this happen frequently? At least he wasn't asking about the toy. So I got up, took him out, and retrieved his toy, which he happily chewed on under the bed until I was finally ready to be awake for the day.

 

The point of the story is: why, Martha Stewart, did you get rid of the crochet toys??

Monday Night Dinner

For dinner this evening I made half a stick of Velveeta cheese with salsa in the crock pot. I also got a 6 pack of Killian's. Delicious. About half way through my pot of cheese and half way through my 6 pack, I started to feel sick with myself and my dinner choice. So I laid on the couch for a while and decided I needed to put some real food in me. Maybe that would make me feel better?

So, since James left for Afghanistan, I have been eating differently. I basically have been living off microwave dinners. They're not all gross actually. I've narrowed them down to a few pretty delicious ones, actually. This last time I went food shopping, I went to a different store than usual. So there were different frozen dinner varieties for me to choose from. Ooh variety!

 

I chose poorly.

 

 

Notice the fish fillet is the same shape as the dish it came in. This tipped me off immediately to not get my hopes up too high for this meal. It had a lot of dark meat in it, which I absolutely refuse to eat. Picasso enjoyed those parts, however. And the fish fillet as a whole was greasy for microwave prepared food. The mac and cheese was probably good, but I had just eaten a half log of Velveeta, so I was all cheesed out!! I give it a thumbs down and will not be buying it again.

 

In total, I've eaten cheese and beer in abundance and a few pieces of gross fish. I need to lay down again.

 

Stress 2013

This sums it all up:

 

I do the most stressful job of 2013 for little more than peanuts.

On top of my medic duties, I also have a plethora of noncommissioned officer duties. This means I work 24/7 for my Soldiers. When they have a problem, no matter if its during the duty day, evening or weekend, I have a problem. They call upon me for help, advise and answers.

This is sort of being like a Mom. But I'm a Mom to 4 grown adults with grown up personal and professional issues that I'm supposed to keep on track and fix if they derail. Juggling my problems with theirs can be very stressful.

And then there's that whole fighting a war thing. That's also stressful.

Stress or not, I really love the Army. True, the Army tests my devotion on a daily basis by throwing obstacles at me that would make most people give up and quit. But I am resilient. And I am a leader. I am a noncommissioned officer.

 

And I am a HUGE walking ball of stress....

Dislike Blogger, DISLIKE

Just a quick thought.

 

I hate the way Blogger has changed how you upload pictures. It took me damn near 2 hours to figure out how to get 1 picture loaded and I ended up doing it on accident so chances are I will struggle next time I need to upload one. What was so wrong with being able to upload from your computer? Why did I have to download Picasa and an app for my phone? Why did I spend 2 hours so frustrated that I actually had to curse out loud at my computer??

 

I'm very unimpressed with you, Blogger. Dislike. DISLIKE!

 

This Picasa symbol was easier to upload, however, if you are friends with me on Google+,  I'm sorry I'm flooding your news feed with ridiculous pictures. Not that anyone uses Google+ anyway....

 

What? January, Really?

It's 63 degrees in Clarksville, Tennessee. This weekend it's projected to be 70 degrees!! It's also January. This just seems unreal to me.

 

 

I was walking Picasso around the yard and making a mental list of the things that need to be done once Spring arrives and I noticed something funny. Well, two somethings funny.

 

1) My trees have buds on them.

 

2) My tulips, crocuses and daffodils are sprouting.

 

It's January. It's 70 degrees. My plants and trees are confused and they're preparing for Spring. They're going to be in a world of pain when they find themselves in overnight freezing temperatures-- say on Sunday night, for example. I hope it doesn't stunt them in any way.

I'm never going to get used to living in the South.