Cirque Du Soleil

I celebrated my 27th birthday in fabulous Las Vegas, Nevada this weekend with one of my VERY best friends, Rosie. It was a great trip! The highlight was when we saw the Cirque Du Soleil Beatles show, "Love". It was very fitting for Rosie and I to see that show together, since we are both long time Beatles freaks... I mean fans. Also, we saw "Love" on October 9th, which happened to be John Lennon's 70th birthday. I am a freak for knowing that trivia fact.

The show was an audio/visual orgasm. I'd never seen a Vegas show before. It sounds so old person to me. But it turned out to be amazing and now I'm a fan of the Vegas productions. I'll go to more. Because there are more trips to Las Vegas planned. There always should be.

Uncasing Ceremony

Today was the Uncasing of the Colors Ceremony. Before we left for Iraq over a year ago, we had a ceremony to case the colors. Basically we put our brigade and battalion flags in an ACU printed sock and left them in it while we went to war. Now that we're back, we can remove it from the sock and add a little streamer on the flag that says we were awesome on our deployment. It's a long ceremony. People give speeches. The I Corps band plays their instruments. Soldiers stand at attention. There is singing involved.

I lucked out and got to pull medical coverage. Which basically meant I stood behind the spectator bleachers with a litter and an aid bag and talked shit with 2 other medics. There was a lot to talk shit on. I love getting to see Soldier's wives. Because all Soldiers generally look the same, but wives come in all shapes and sizes and classiness.

There were an insane amount of babies present. If you do the math, that means most Soldiers had a really good mid-tour leave with their wives or there was some scandalous stuff going on while Daddy was at war. There even seemed to be designated, yet unmarked, stroller parking behind the bleachers.

The best part of this particular ceremony is that it kicked off our block leave period. 30 days where every Soldier who deployed has a chance to take leave and finally relax and go on vacation. I have quite the vacation planned for myself. First off: Las Vegas with my bestie. Then I'll be whisked away to wonderful Richmond, Virginia to visit another bestie. Lastly, but certainly not least, I'll go to fabulous Davenport, Iowa to visit my fabulous parents! It'll be nice to put my uniform away and feel like a real human being for a month.

Mourning A Dear Friend

I am in a state of deep mourning. I lost something very dear to me. Something I fear I will never find again, even with a lifetime of training. I feel lost. I feel alone. I feel deep regret.

I lost my alcohol tolerance.

That's right folks. I was in the best drinking shape of my life before taking that vacation to Iraq for 12 months. I was a champion, a master of my craft. I could have gone places and been someone, you know? But it's gone now. I'm starting at square one.

It's scary to start over. I feel like I might accidentally be that girl who gets too drunk too fast and makes an ass out of herself. An amateur. I prefer to make an ass out of myself after having an outrageous amount of booze so people are more understanding of my situation. "Oh, she's flashing the bartender because she's had 17 shots of Jack Daniels," is way more hard core than, "Holy crap, she's only had 2 beers and she's puking in the street."

Last night I got pretty tossed off of 3 Long Island Iced Teas. I didn't puke in the street or show my boobs to strangers. I wasn't that wrecked. But I wasn't at a level I was comfortable with, either. I've got to find my alcohol tolerance and self respect! ASAP.

NCO Run

I don't know why, but the Army thinks it's necessary to celebrate things by running. Thanksgiving? Let's run! Martin Luther King Jr Day? Let's run! 4 day weekend with no holiday significance? Let's run! It's Friday? Let's run!

So this morning we ran to celebrate the 43 brand new Non Commissioned Officers that were promoted down range in Iraq. Every NCO in the battalion got together (that was a whole lot of people, too) with our Command Sergeant Major and she took us on a run from Hell in honor of all of us newbies.

I understand the tradition. CSM Walter tried to pump us up and motivate us with a speech about how we are the backbone of the Army and nothing would get done without us. But personally, I do not like being physically exhausted by 0730 in the morning. I do not wish to celebrate an important career milestone that way. Sweating and wishing for sweet death does not equal a party for me. I felt no joy the entire run, until we stopped and I could finally catch my breath and put the flames out in my calves.

Don't get me wrong, I love my job and I love being a Non Commissioned Officer. But jeesh, can we for once just celebrate with beers?

Pike Place Market

I went to Pike Place Market in Seattle for the first time yesterday. Never mind that I've been stationed at Fort Lewis for over 2 years and I have yet to explore Seattle. There was a lot of liquor to drink closer to home so that's what I concentrated on when I first came up to Washington. Now that I feel like I've conquered the liquor battle, I can move on to more touristy and day-light activities.

The Market was packed, but that's because it was a beautiful, warm, sunny Saturday. And let's face it, in Seattle, that happens approximately twice a year. I bought a few nick-knacks at some of the shops, got possibly the most beautiful bouquet of fresh flowers and had amazing Chinese food.

I witnessed and Asian tourist posing for a picture with a street bum. The guy's poor son was taking a picture of his dad giving a bum a quarter. I bet that poor street guy was absolutely mortified. Silly Asian tourists.

I finally saw the famous "gum wall". It was pretty gross. But impressive. I half expected it to smell minty fresh down that alley, but it mostly just smelled like a gross damp alley.

Exploring the area I live is fun! Now I'm going to have to pick another place to visit next weekend... weather permitting of course.

I'm Legal!

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I'm legal! Finally! Legally (and happily) divorced!

Cheers to the bachelorette life!

Now, I've got to see about getting my old last name back. Being a "W" and at the end of the alphabet backfires a lot on me in the military. Never, ever, is anything good done in reverse alphabetical order. Back to the "D" life at the beginning of the line that I missed so much!

JBLM

While I was gone, things happened at Fort Lewis. Most noticeably, it's name changed! No longer are the days of Fort Lewis and McChord Air Force Base as separate entities. They mutated together to form Joint Base Lewis-McChord, or, JBLM for short. Of course there's an acronym; the Army is involved.

Nothing really has changed since we joined forces. I mean, the Army still demeans the Air Force like it's our job. The Air Force still uses our hospital, like they have all along. The Air Force still has better housing and chow halls. There isn't even a road that connects the two bases even though they are only one exit apart on the freeway.

So it's kinda like saying we'll play nice with one another, but only in theory.

Mountain Of Debris

I moved into my new apartment over the weekend. It's a cute little one bedroom apartment in a shitty little town outside Fort Lewis. I'm really happy to have all of my loot again and to not have a roommate. I'm taking advantage of not having to put shoes on to use the bathroom, of choosing where and what I want to eat, and driving a vehicle that is not up armored.

I'm finally getting used to being back in the States. Even if it has rained almost every day since I've been back.

I have a mountain of debris left over from the move. The movers are supposed to pick up the looming pile of garbage, but their hours of availability don't really line up with my hours of availability. So I may have to dispose of it myself, which I really don't want to do. I live on the third floor, and something about not being able to see my feet while descending wet stairs seems like disaster waiting to happen.

As soon as I get my home all set up, I'll post pics.

Yay! It's so good to be back!

I Loathe Montana

I left my Ford Escape in Iowa with my parents while I spent the year vacationing in Iraq. It was a good deal, my SUV was looked after by people I know, and the people I know had a 2008 SUV play with. The bummer side of this arrangement was that I had to go get my SUV. It's a 30 hour trip from Davenport, Iowa to Fort Lewis, Washington. Oh, and I made the trip 24 hours after landing back in the United States. Sheesh, I don't always make the safest decisions, but nothing bad happened on my half cross country trip.

Before I left my parent's house for the driving bonanza, I called my Grandma DeGraf to let her know I was home safe from Iraq. I told her I was going to drive back to Washington (stupidly). Her advise was to lock my doors and not talk to strangers. She also suggested I only get gas during daylight hours. I don't know why I even opened my mouth.

I made the trip in 3 days, and I think all of day 2 was spent in Montana. I loathe Montana. Not only is there nothing there, the nothing takes up a whole lot of space. I was slamming Rockstar Energy Drinks to keep focused on the road. The problem with energy drinks is that they run right through you. The problem with drinking them in Montana is that the rest stops are all approximately 100 miles apart.

So I leaped from my SUV at some random rest stop and flew into the non-modern bathroom, if you know what I mean, to take care of some business. Relief. I decided to stretch my legs and took a stroll through the grass.

Isn't that cute? A doggy rest stop right next to the person rest stop. I think the dog's potty may have been cleaner. So I snapped a picture like a weird tourist. And that's when I noticed the sky was about to open up any second and pour all over me. So I walked back through the grass to hop in my SUV, and I came face to face with this.

Holy crap, Montana. Seriously? There isn't a hospital in hundreds of miles! Thanks for posting the sign after I practically did cartwheels through your grass! Before, I hated Montana based solely on it's size. But now I can add 'dangerous wildlife' to my list.

America, Fuck Yeah!

My Iraq deployment 2009-2010 is finally finished!

I left Kuwait in the wee hours of the morning on the first of September. It was a pretty rough trip for me because I kept getting motion sick. Motion sickness is something new that my body has started to do since I've gotten older. I shouldn't be falling apart at 26, but it is what it is.

Also, I think I had a brain aneurysm-- a couple of them in fact! Every time the plane landed, something that can only be described as intense snaps of horrific pain flashed through my brain over my left eye. It happened 4 times. I hope this isn't going to be a nifty new sign of old age.

It just isn't traveling in the Army if you aren't asleep on the floor of an airport at some point.

It feels great to be back in the United States. Even though I currently am homeless, vehicleless and basically jobless thanks to this Labor Day 4 day weekend. Food tastes good in this country. Americans are fat for a reason, and I'm going to gorge myself of deliciousness until I have to go back to reality and start a work routine again.

**On a side note, since I am no longer in Iraq, it seems a little wreckless to still call my blog Iraqi Jackie. I am, however, still Jackie, so I don't want to switch things up too much. Any suggestions for a new blog name are much appreciated!